Day 35

"And that's what its all about..."

~The Hokey Pokey

Grateful for hugs, big and small

Terri (my cousin) for some reason was going through pictures today, and tagged this one several times.

I looked at it, each time the notice came up on my phone, that Terri had tagged me, Rylee, Regan, Terri, Aunt Jean...and it brought me back to that day.

I guess I am not trying to make this a sad post, because it should not be.  But, instead, I wanted to look at the picture one more time tonight before bed.  Terri had my mom staying with her and Kraig and Cam during the last few weeks of Aunt Jean's life.  Thank GOD, in hindsight, because we all "thought" Aunt Jean was going to be ok for a little while longer.

Funny thing, cancer.

You just never know when your last hour will be, when your last phone call will be.  My last phone call consisted of me giving Aunt Jean shit for being on all of the good drugs, and told her to feel better and get some rest, and that I loved her...and she said, "shit, these are good drugs, I am fine."

And then she said "love you too, honey."

So this picture, taken at Terri's the night before the funeral, was a meltdown.  The girls had really realized what had gone on...Terri had lost <<her Mom>>.  Terri just sat down next to them and tried to explain that she was ok and Aunt Jean was in a better place, and before you knew it, Terri needed to say no more, because the three girls all wrapped their arms around her and hugged her. 

This is something you can't understand unless you have felt it before, but there was so much pure and innocent love in this room...that for one second...one moment in time, it was ok.

We were all together, we were all missing her, and we were all quietly...silently...telling each other with just one hug...we are here, we are here, and so is she.

...so...

is she.

And for the record, I would like to say that my Mom... is for sure...the strongest woman I know.

She...amazes me, and I think every day that goes by and I see that "Gram Hancock" twinkle in her eyes, or that Aunt Jean look...I love her all the more.

Blessed are we.