Day 176

A train ride in Boone made my day, and I know it made my kids' day...and 5 other special kids' day as well.

Grateful for time allowed

I know it might sound crazy...but I am thankful that my place of work allows me to spend time with young adults with special needs.
I am grateful that I get to be a part of their dreams, hopes, and successes. I love that I get to have a part in the smiles they display, the sign language they communicate with, or the way they vocalize because they cannot talk.
I love that my Mom and Dad met at the Children's Home in Superior, Wisconsin...and married.
I love that my Mom trusted enough in my Dad that moving far far away from her family to take a job at a place that was new, small, and unfamiliar...and in a different state...was the right thing to do.
I love that my Dad and Mom surrounded us with people with special needs/disabilities during our entire childhood.  I cannot say that during that time (especially in high school) that I was not teased, made fun of, etc., because my Dad took care of  "retards."
It truly sucked.  I wanted to crawl into a hole...because I didn't really know at that time...that the people who make fun...they just are not lucky enough to be where my Dad is...or now, where I am, or where my kids are, or where any 11 of the grand kids are.
When my children can walk into my place of work...and sit on the floor and play trucks with someone who is non-verbal...and my kids are giggling endlessly along with him = priceless.
When my kids can ride on the Boone and Scenic Valley Railroad with me, staff, and 5 awesome young adults in wheelchairs, and my kids are smiling, laughing, as are the 5 kids for the ENTIRE 2.5 hour ride = priceless.
When my kids come into my place of work and greet each one with no fear, no judgement, nothing...and talk to them = Grampie and Grampie and all of us have done something right when everything else seems to be going wrong.
When Austin comes to my work and wants to tell "Grampie's kids" a whole bunch of stories about everything under the sun, and he pushes a wheelchair for a walk and gets stuck on a curb and loudly whispers to the consumer, "Ah...sorry....just a little bump there, but this thing is heavy with you in it....the wheelchair....not you....uh, sorry, no offense." = priceless.
When my kids come home, and ask questions about being different, and I answer them best as I can, and they come back with "God made everyone different.."
Well, that's priceless too.
I am blessed to have the family I have.
I am blessed to have parents who taught me things that I will always keep with me.
I am blessed that I get to spend time with awesome people every time I go to work.
Beauty is skin deep.
Believe it.
Didn't really learn that or believe that until I started doing what I do.
Or maybe I am just getting to the age where it's not all about "me" anymore...and more about others.  I like this age.  I like this time.
Nonetheless, I am blessed, and thank God for my job and thank God for these kids.
*and a lot proud of my father for being named businessman of the year in the City of Ames.*

Day 175

"Why the long face?"

Grateful for horse faces.

Really, its something that my Dad said to me when John Kerry was running for President.
We saw him so many times on tv, that the quote became, "Why the long face, John?"  He totally had a long horse face.
So maybe that's not nice.  Well, I know its not nice.
Funny, but wrong.
So I shared this story with one of my good friends.  Now what happens?
Every time we pass someone with a long face, we try really hard to take a picture of them and then instantly mms each other the picture with "Why the long face?" attached.
I kind of envy long faces.
Maybe there is someone out there who is taking pictures and mms-ing their friends with my face as the pic with this quote...."Why the round face?"
Hm.
Well then they could call it roundbook instead of horse book or face book...
...and if that was the case, I wouldn't join and I would prolly hang up too.
Funny, but wrong.
But still funny.



Day 174

Absofrigginglootley....

Grateful for spit spot and pip pip cheerio

I know.  Its not really normal, but then again, nothing is normal about me, or my family.
It is what it is.
So I have been known to talk like Mary Poppins in the mall...and at Disney...and then keep doing it.  Why? Um...well, its fun. (For me, anyway)
Uncle Mark likes to do this also.
He likes the line, "Pip, pip, cheerio."
I like that one also, but I like the one from Mrs. Doubtfire,
"Come on now, poppets.."
We have had "lets talk like Mary Poppins Days" at our house.
Its awesome.
Even if you have to have a come to Jesus Meeting with your kids that day, it has to be in Mary Poppins talk, and then its not such a huge come to Jesus, because you are laughing at how everything comes out.
Below is a video favorite of mine of Kailey Kathleen.
She was five here...and at the end, I asked her to sing like Mary Poppins.  Watch her facial expressions as she changes to the accent of Mary Poppins.
She has a bit of George Banks in her, also.  Even the eye winking.

Lets go fly a kite.

And if you want, while we are at the park and you see someone else, use Uncle Mark's famous line.

"Pip pip Cheerio"

love that. :)

I forsee me making a talk like Mary Poppins day in Disney in November.

Jamie and Matt will disown us, but I know Uncle Mark is game. :)

Day 173

ZACTLY.

Grateful for the FAT gene

Well, its not like its any one's fault.  We all have it in us.  It just lurks there, waiting silently until you turn about 36...and then...it's all downhill from there.
Remembering that one time at band camp for me...and wishing that for one second, I could go back there.
Just for one second.
And then some.
I hate working out. 
But somewhere in here, I gotta find my mojo.
Mostly lately, its been me finding the mojitos.
and food.
so mojo....get here.
yesterday.
or, knowing me, I might eat or drink you.
*yep*

Day 172

"Cows cows cows cows."
~Iowa

Grateful for Iowa

Yep, I said it.  I don't really mind the cows.  They don't really mind me, I don't think, either.  Well, except for when we went cow tipping many times in high school and junior high. 
It was scary and funny all at the same time...mostly to us, not the cows.

P.S.
I think the "Drunk Lake People" label is hilarious and most accurate too.

Day 171

My heart feels.  Does yours?

Grateful for hearts that feel...

Have you ever wished for something so hard that your eyes were closed as tight as possible?
I have.  I have watched my kids wish for something that hard, with eyes squeezed shut, hoping and wishing that their wish would come true.
Have you ever closed your eyes in prayer, and found yourself lost in thought?  Lost in memories of who you are praying for?  I know when I would pray for Aunt Jean to get better in church, or in the comfort of my own bed...my eyes were closed, and I would find myself remembering her, seeing her and I doing fun things together, memories.
When I pray for someone to feel better, for Papa to make it through another chemo treatment, for him to stay strong...I find myself remembering Papa telling me stories and that great Irish smile he has.
When I dream, which I very rarely do, I normally wake myself laughing out loud.
Then Matt tells me to quit it.
Then that makes me not able to stop laughing.
Our hearts hold the key to everything.
Our eyes closed allow us to focus on our hearts desire, our hearts language.
Our hearts feel, and we can only see when we take the time to close our eyes and remember.
For that, I think, is what God wants us to do.
To see the whole picture, to see everything through our hearts, our minds eye.
Its the quiet time...the time when we are alone with our thoughts
our prayers
our wishes
our hopes...
...that we find out what is most important in our lives.
I have a lot of importants.
For some reason, I look forward to closing my eyes tonight.
<3
Maybe just to catch a glimpse of another memory of someone i miss.
because God made that possible for us.
Thank you, God.

Day 170

The last dance recital...together.  These two have been in ballet together since they were 3.

Grateful for this many years...

When Jenny and Jason and Matt and I enrolled the girls into the 2 for 1 special at Robert Thomas ballet...who knew what we were getting ourselves into.
Now, with this having been our last recital, our girls are 12.  Ten days apart.
Best friends.  Best friend cousins.
Our little ballerinas.  Our girls who have stood by each other day in and day out.
Our girls. 
Mary Bizbef
and Rylee.
I hope you both remember to dance through life, dance through everything, and have fun while you are doing it.
That's what life is all about.
<3
Kinda like the hokey pokey.
We love you both, and your friendship will grow stronger no matter how far the miles are.
Love you both, and keep dancing.

Day 169

"We're just going to walk our kids around the block."
~Kailey

Grateful for imagination

Ever since Kailey was little, she had a love for stuffed animals.  All three of my girls all loved their lovies the most.  But then came Kailey...and not only was it her lovie...but EVERY animal this kid has....has a name, and is one of her "kids."
And trust me, she knows when one is missing.
She has a list during the school year that is posted on her wall in her room.  She marks down "who" goes to school with her each day, so one is not taken with her more than one day.  It's all about being fair to her kids.
At night, she routinely says the following:
"Good night stomach, good night heart, good night brain, good night self...good night God, I love you, good night stuffed animals, I love you, sleep well, and I will see you in the morning."  Then, this song follows...
"Dear God, I am calling.  Please listen, its me.
You know all about me, from a to z,  you know when I'm frightened, sad or alone...
please stay close beside me, make your heart my home."
So when Kailey wants to take her kids on a walk, or take her kids somewhere, I let her.  It's like they are real to her.
Today, she was soo excited to take her lovie named Hippie on the train ride, as Hippie had never been on a train.  Hippie has been on nearly every ride in Disneyworld, but had to go on the Boone and Scenic Valley Railroad.  Hippy had a good day...says Kailey.
I love her imagination and her love for her animals. <3

Day 168

Campfires make good story places.

Grateful for fires in the summer

Its the summer, its time for many nights of nothing to do except imagine, tell stories, and be together with those we love.
During the school year, we are all rushed and pressed for time.
Trying to get assignments done, trying to get the projects and reports done for school.  The spelling test words gone over.  The math lessons for the week...studied and checked.
Summer.  Thank God for summer.  It gives us much needed time to just be.
The grass under our bare feet.  The fireflies flying around to be caught and put in a mason jar with holes in the lid.
Fishing, finding frogs, and just looking at the stars.
Swimming in the lake, the pool, and feeling the warm sunshine on our faces.
And at night, sitting around a campfire with friends and family...telling stories and sharing food and drink.
And most importantly, smores.
How we love summer.
Thank you summer 2011, for finally getting here.
<3
We needed you.

Day 167



True statement.  I know nothing in church is funny, but usually for me, it is...then...yeah, not cool.  Can't laugh like that in church.

Grateful for laughter in the wrong place
All the time.  I always am the one that would start laughing in class to the point where the "holding it in" didn't work so well.
Eventually, noises would come out of my mouth, and I got sent to the hallway to settle down, or to see the principal.
(go figure)
I see this in our girls.  They start laughing, to the point of no return...and the snickering becomes louder, the squeaks of noise between their fingers become higher, and the eyes grow bigger.
Matt will usually say then...."Fun is fun, but silliness is something else again."
He likes to quote Mimi.


You know its really bad when you are in church with your Father, your sister, your brother and your Mother...and all the significant others and children...and someone farts...and the laughter starts with the pews shaking from all of us trying really hard to hold it in.
Or when Austin says "AMEN" really loud...that can cause a giggle.
Or when you just exchange a glance...or a smirk.
Or when you are like me and you think of something and out of nowhere, you just start laughing.
Spectrum.
We are all on it.
And sometimes....even though its not the time or place...laughter is the best medicine.



Day 166

Exactly.  Now that's funny.

Grateful for that little hang up button.

Not appropriate, but funny.
I  can't tell you how many times I have gotten phone calls where I just wish I would not have pressed the green talk button or swiped the answer the call button.
I wish that I could say this sometimes.
Since I know my Mom reads the blog, I can't really admit that I FEEL this way a lot.
But, ask Janice about a telemarketer or otherwise phone call....this...is
EXACTLY
what Janice is thinking, but she is waay too nice to admit that.
So, this is my way of admitting it for her.
Mom, its ok.  Those telemarketers suck...and you have to admit, that picture up above...it made you chuckle your ass off. 
Admit it in your head if nothing else.  Everyone in there knows you.
Wow, we are soo alike. 
Love you.

Day 165

This is the best boy in all of Story County.  And Him Momma love Him.  Lots.


Grateful for the best boy in the Gibbs family

We didn't have a boy.  Instead, we were blessed with 3 girls.  Which, really, has been really super fun thus far as parents.  Coconut was not a wanted boy at all by him Daddy.  Coconut came about by me...because I decided we needed him.  And so, Jamie and I went up north of Mason City to get him with Jackson and Kailey.
He was brought to Blessing of the Animals that day at school.
Him was blessed, and we love him. 
He crawls into bed at night with Matt and I, and he lays in between us.  If Matt gets too close to me, he growls and sometimes bites.  (Him Mommy BOY)
:) 
And when Matt isn't in bed and I am...he lies him head on Matt's pillow...and I even cover him up because him gets cold sometimes.
Matt does not heart this.  At all.
But he has really grown on Matt.  They are buddies.  They have bonded...they are the only boys in the house, even though Matt says "His name is Coconut, but he has no nuts anymore....but its the closest thing I can get to a boy in this house."  So Matt and Coconut have bonded.  (Even though Matt won't really admit that...he loves him boy too.)

I love Doug.  I love Coconut.

Just when you think you didn't need a dog...

this clip will tell you why you need one.

Everyone needs a Mommy Boy.

I even call him "Son."

*that makes Matt barf a little, but I do it for that reason.*

:)

Day 164

We are going to skype with Uncle Jason...who wants to skype?!?

Grateful for technology

Really?  You ask yourself.  Yes, really.  We all were having a pool party here, and Jason was stuck in Wisconsin working.  So...he thought it would be great if we skyped him.
Bad idea, Gus.
Maybe its one of those things that is ok if you are normal...skype.
But...none of us in this family are normal.  As Jamie says, we are all on the
"spectrum" somewhere.
Who WOULDN'T think its funny to moon Uncle Jason?
It was funny.  Funny....but wrong.
But Austin thought this was the best.
As you can tell from his face...he thought this was great. 
As you can tell from Jason's face...hmm....not so much...
Max....he was in an asthma attack laughing.
Appropriate or inappropriate?
Yeah.
Skpe with the fam.
You never know what you might run across....
:)

Day 163

"Dancing irish feels like my heart is smiling from inside out."
~Regan Gibbs

Grateful for smiling hearts

Ok. so look at this kid.  If she doesn't look like she is having fun...I don't know what then.
She dances and shines.  Her smile lights up the stage.
Her stage presence is amazing.
But...like me....she lacks self confidence.
She is soo sensitive....again, like me.
But, when she does something and does it well, she needs that reinforcement that she just did something awesome.
Regan Mariah Gibbs...you are one of the best little irish dancers we know.
We know you can go soo far.  You have the cutest face, the techniques will come from your new school...and you will be someone not to mess with.
You, my girl...will go far.
I love you....to the moon and back.
Forever.
Just like Walt Disney says..."No wish is too extreme.."
If you believe it, you can do it.
Love you, kiddo...keep dancing.  You are amazing, and you can make it to the top.
Just believe in yourself!
We believe in you.
<3

Day 162

No shit, Sherlock.

Grateful for one time at band camp....

Ok, well, one time at band camp...I was skinny.  But...the whole time I was SKINNY....I thought I was fat.
Hmm.  And here I am today, the heaviest I have been to date...and I think back to the days of being waaay under normal...and I remember my mind thinking I was a blimp.
Hm...
Well, I would be happy with just being able to meet in the middle somewhere, and not have to give up and occasional drink or three.
I don't need to impress anyone, I just need to be ok with where I am, and if I'm not...then I need to make changes where needed.
Yup...
here goes nothing.
uggh.



Day 161

Math effing sucks.

Grateful that I don't have to do math anymore

Its one of those things that makes me stress out just by saying the word.
MATH.
Bite me.
I have hated math since I was at St. Cecilia School.  I remember Mrs. Gowdy telling me I had to get it or I would never pass to the next grade.  I remember counting on my fingers and being told I can't do that...then I was all like...fml...but in first grade words.
I remember getting sooo frustrated with math that I would take my pencil and press as hard as possible on my paper and crack the lead...just so I could have the excuse to get up and get away from the shit.
First, who the HELL cares when train A is going to arrive at the station if it travels 5 mph faster than train B.  And when the stupid paper asks to "find X" .....
well, above is a picture of what I would do on all of my tests. 
Why the hell would I care what x does or where it goes or why should I find it?
Not my fault if its lost.
x.
Like I give a shit where you hid.
I have more to worry about in my life.
I am pretty sure I don't need to keep track of where x is.
So, find x?  No sir.  I don't give a shit.
X can just get the hell out of my life.
or it can take train B or train A...but it can figure out which one is faster all by itself, because I don't need to help.  X never helped me.  = paybacks, mother effer.





Day 160

I need this bag.

Grateful for "Will you pick up this on your way home..."


I HATE grocery shopping.
I will try to not do it for as long as possible, and then still avoid it.
I am not sure why, I just hate it.
I think it's the smell.
Maybe its me.
Well, of course its me....but things still stink in the grocery store.
Plus, stupid people piss me off, and they usually get in front of me, and then it takes A LOT to not say something that may or may not be deemed as appropriate.
(Here is where Reno's kid comes in)
BUT...I am not the coupon clipping Reno who buys 8 jars of Peter Pan Peanut Butter because it was so cheap.  Mom and I both were like who the hell DOES that?  And who the hell buys that brand?
Well, we need some food in this house.
I think this bag is my next craft project.
Either that, or Jamie and I will order them and shop together.
Why?
Because we can, and this bag here...well it might save an effing tree or something.
So, that's cool.

 

Day 159

This would be amazing.  Can we go back to this time?

Grateful for hopes

Well, we can all hope.
And maybe dream.
Yep...this would be Awesomeness in its truest form.
:)
I think I shall try this method tomorrow.
I know everyone knows that Mommy deserves a drink.
All the time.
Even 5'oclock should be moved ahead to whatever time the Mommy decides.
:)

Day 158

Drunk Octopusses would suck.

Grateful for no octopi in Iowa

I think drunk things are ok.  Matt and I think that drinking is something that you do to cope so you don't
A: kill each other
B: kill each other
C: kids....
D: damned dog poop and divorce...it would be way too expensive, so lets just get drunk and deal with each other.
E: Effing had it with work/kids/school/dumbasses/whatever
F: Fuck.
G: Great.  I knew I was the only one who does shit around here
H: Bloody Hell...its never good to be near there.
I: Ice.  Chomping, Chewing, and just having an endless supply is heaven.
J: Just STOPPIT!  Leave your sister alone!
K: I will kill you in your sleep if you fart one more time in this bed
L: lists.  get the shit I put on the list, and don't make me have to write the name brand.
M: MOM said, so if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!
N: nonsense.  everyday should have some, but not too much.
O: OMG.
P:  People Order Our Patties.  Matt and I get space madness in the car.  This is an example.
Q: Quitters.  Rehab is for quitters.  I am not a quitter.  Nor is Matt.
R:  RUN, FORREST, RUN!
S:  SERIOUSLY...I hate that word.
T: Take that shit, and then some.
U:  Uranus.  A planet that isn't a planet anymore, but made me laugh out loud and get in trouble in school.
V: Vroom.  Don't ask.
W:  "WHITE BOYS!! LETS GO!"~Jamie
X: xrays.  have we had enough yet this year?  Dammit....600.00 short for the 5000.00 deductible
Y: Yar of spit.  Sven on Ren and Stimpy had one, and he is awesome.
Z: zen and shit.  I think I need a Zen garden, but then I would be obsessive about it.  No lines in the sand, because what if I crossed it?

Perhaps I'd find a drunk octopus.
That would be awesome.
:)

Day 157



This will be my first and only tattoo...if i have the guts.

Grateful for guts.

Never have really had guts.  I might talk the talk, but when it comes to walking the walk....well....unless I have had vodka...I can't do it.
Tattoos.
I have claimed I will never go there. 
Ever.
Until I saw this one.
I could do this one.  Only if Jamie and Terri and Balcer and Angela and Janelle and Tom and Jason do..
Then maybe a Pooh Bear somewhere.
Maybe.
Because when I see this saying, I feel Aunt Jean and Gram RIGHT HERE.
RIGHT NOW.
And Janice, I know you would more than less than approve...but I dont' really think your idea of a USDA stamp on your ass cheek in red is klassy either.
Funny....but wrong.
So, just jump and do the tat with us all.
Because we love you too...to the moon.
(And Reno doesn't need to see the USDA on your ass.)
eww.
Wow, wish I would not have just typed that, cuz now...I have a very bad image in my head. 
EFFING EWW.
:/



Day 156

May the light always find you on a dreary day.
When you need to be home, may you find your way.
May you always have courage to take a chance
And never find frogs in your underpants.

~Irish Blessing

Grateful for Irish at recital time

The girls love irish dance.  They have loved it from day one.  They have had Allie, who they love and adore.  They have had Clare, who they love as well.

Allie has given them a piece of her life and they have embraced it and loved it. I dont' know how many times they  have been told to stop irish dancing down the grocery store, and library, and even in the kitchen when they just see that floor that might make noise.

They tap their fingers to irish.  They know steps, combinations, and they know they love this dance.

I love irish at recital time, because amidst the falling asleep of the ballet piece that goes for 8 minutes...irish comes out and slams their feet on the stage and wakes everyone up.

This year, I loved irish at recital because in this photo, the two girls who never get along...posed this way.

<3

It melted my heart.

Then, to offer each other some advice and direction of how to execute a step...

...makes my day.

These two need to learn to get along, and irish seems to be the key to that.

Thank God for their teachers until now that have shared their passion with them.

They have lit a fire underneath their feet which will carry them far.

I <3 Irish...and I <3 my girls.

The possibilities are endless.

To the moon, kids.

 

Day 155

"I don't see much sense in that," said Rabbit. "No," said Pooh humbly, "there isn't. But there was going to be when I began it. It's just that something happened to it along the way."
Winnie the Pooh
Grateful for 11 "Happens"

Here it was.  The night before the Bergs move to Wisconsin and start their new adventure.  All the while prior to this day, there were 11 "happens" that "happened". 
11 kids that grew up together knowing each other's secrets, smiles, sadness, silliness, and everything else.
11 happened.
11 live and breathe for each other, some only days apart.
11 that would put themselves out there to help their cousins no matter what.
They always say, "Things happen for a reason."
I do believe that.  We have all been through thick and thin together.
This night.
90 plus degrees.  11 kids and Jamie and I, and Jason and Jenny, just "happened" to help load a 26 foot U-Haul with everything they owned.
It was hot, it was awful, it was tiring and we thought we could not go anymore.
But you know, it got done.  It happened to work with all the chaos and heat...and crabbiness.
And when it was done, the pool party was the reward.  Everyone was exhausted beyond means, but we got together and hung out.  It was bittersweet.
We all avoided the issue of them actually leaving until the very last minute...at 11pm.
Then...the kids began crying, we began crying, Mom and Dad were crying.  Gannon smiled through his tears here.  I was taking the picture through tears.
11 "happens" were together, living in the same town...for the very last day, and it hit them all at once.
Life happens.
Life is about new adventures.
Life is about holding on and letting go.
Every day, every thing you say, everything you do...happens.
Make it count, and be thankful for every single thing that
"happens"
along your way.



Day 154

St. Cecilia School 2011 last day <3

Grateful for last days
Last day of school for these kiddos.  Cece graduated from 5th grade, Regan done with 4th, Erin done with kindergarten, and Kailey done with 1st grade.
Summer vacation.
Sad that the Berg's won't be at Saint Cecilia next year with us.
These cousins have had it so good...to be so close.
Many memories were made at this school for Brennan, Mary, Rylee and now these four.
Last day of school....first day of a new adventure.
<3
It's gonna be GOOOOD!





Day 153

"Truly wonderful, the mind of a child is."
~Yoda

Grateful for child's play


Pick up a ball, grab some kids, and PLAY.
That's what we used to do growing up.  We used to run outside in the mornings of summer, and grab whomever we could, and play.  It didn't matter what it was that we were doing, we just were happy to have someone to play with.
This night, these kids were all over for BBQ and swimming, smores over a campfire.
They played hard, they played well, they played and begged for more. 
It was an awesome summer night, and these kids had such fun together.
Many memories were made, new friendships formed, and it will be done again soon.
How great of a night this was. 
<3

Day 152

Out of the mouth of babes.

Grateful for kids and their prayers

Today I am thankful for kids and their prayers.  Kailey brought this home today, and she told me that it was a prayer flower that Mrs. Hammer had taken to church for her class to be blessed by Father.
All three of my girls have been through too much cancer in the family, too much cancer with kids they know, friends we know, etc.
I pray that someday they find a cure for cancer.
I pray that we someday never have to hear that word again.
I pray that we have more time to make memories with Papa.
I pray that the chemo works.
I pray that Grammy is strong by Papa's side.
I have said it before, but I will say it again.  Every single night, before she goes to bed, Kailey says her prayers and sings the Dear God, I am calling song.
I am glad that God listens, and that God watches over us all.
I pray for my husband's Dad, he has cancer, and we want him well.
We want him to beat it.
We pray, I pray.
<3

Day 151

Buffalo Wild Wings with the not so special special.

Grateful for large groups

Well it was a great idea.  Jamie called and said, let's all go out to eat at B-dubs, because they have 50 wings for 9.99 tonight.  So all of us went.  Including Mom and Dad.  We got there and we nearly took up the entire place.  (We totally didn't stick out like sore thumbs.)  And then...well, oops...the special was not tonight.
No big deal.
We all ordered anyway, and waited for our food.  The kids were laughing, and having fun together because they all knew that soon these days would be few and far between.

The poor waitress that had to deal with all of us and the separate checks...well, good thing I was not her.  I would have lost my mind.

Wait. 

I know...its already gone. 

No, it was messed up as all get out...but that's what happens in large groups. 

Me...I suck at handling stress like that.  I just do.

Lets just say it's a good thing I don't work there.  It was loud and loud and loud, and we were a large group and doing math problems in loud places would suck even worse than math problems in quiet places.

B-dubbs.

It was good, but not going to do a large group there again...and...it was loud...which means I am prolly getting old. 



Day 150



The best Aunt a girl could ask for

Grateful for the Brule River

Uncle Tom's cabin.  On the Brule River. 
The Brule River for me makes me think of "Annie Neemie."  She is a ghost that shows up there all the time.
I am not a fan of ghosts, and I have been scared shitless of Annie Neemie's ghost ever since Aunt Jean told me about seeing her out on the Brule.
But Aunt Jean liked scary stories, and scary shit to tell me.  She just did.
She took pure pride and joy out of scaring people...at all costs.
All I know is, I don't want to see Annie Neemie.  I don't want her to mess with me in the Brule. I don't want her to make canoeing this July hard for me in the Brule.
I would like for Aunt Jean to be nice to me in July when we go canoeing in the Brule with 11 kids.
Aunt Jean is in the Brule.  She is near the Brule.  Uncle Tom wakes up and sees that beautiful place every morning.
Minus Annie Neemie.


The Brule River.
I am so happy that Aunt Jean is a part of you.
I am so happy Aunt Jean is a part of me.
I am so happy Aunt Jean is a part of my family, my kids.
I am so happy that come July, I get to visit you again...and I will get to see Aunt Jean's resting place.
Its peaceful.
Maybe her and Annie Neemie talk at night.
That's fine, I just don't want to hear about it.
:)

to the moon.  love you.  as long as I'm living, my Aunt you will be.
<3



Day 149

No words.

Grateful for awesome.

I love awesome.  I know it's one of those words that gets over-used, and out-dated.
But there are times that "awesome" is just what I need.
I think its awesome Austin has this shirt...and that he is proud to be awesome.
I think its awesome that I have a shirt that says, "This is prolly my awesomest shirt."
(Its awesome.)
Again, this is why I know I am somewhere on the spectrum of autism...or OCD or ADD or who the hell knows what.
It's awesome that I can say that about myself and still be ok with who I am.
Its awesome that Reno and Janice somehow had something to do with me being as awesome as I am...and it's awesome that I have three girls who rock the house.
<3